MY FIRST CRUSH

- Neethu Nandavar

No, I really do not know how to begin my story. It all started on that bright Sunday morning. As I strolled through the Tagore Memorial Park, I had my first glance of him. I do not even remember what first attracted me to him. Perhaps it was the magic of his grey eyes, or may be the thick mop of hair that took the cap, or may be, oh, yes, it must have been his hands! Soft delicate, yet such strong hands…

Then it began, I waited frenziedly for his arrival at the TM Park every morning. Before I realised this turned out to be a habit. Every morning saw both of us with the same agenda. He in one of his gorgeous jogging suits jogged into the park, performed a few more warm ups and some more stretches and push ups. Exhausted he took one of the opposite seats placed all over the park and for the next quatrer of an hour relaxed before he jogged back home and I? I watched him through all this. And finally took one of those seats nearest to him gazing fondly at him, wishing him to dart at least a glance at me at least once. I could be patient, very patient, when I want to be. And I know patience could be rewarding. Everyday I waited for him to take a bench so that I could occupy the bench nearest to it. I never dared to share his bench. Oh, my god ! how very outrageous to a decent female, not that he would mind very much, but I for one have always been a shy one.

So, the worst happened. A day came when I could take it no longer. I decided that this was the last day. Either he has to give me a glance, a smile and start a conversation or, I’ll break all the barriers of my shyness and disclose my innermost feelings to him. Yes, I’ll tell him what I felt.

The next morning found me at the TM Park at dawn. I had thoroughly rehearsed my part the previous night and nothing in the world deterred me in my course of action. Yes, I’ll show him what I felt for him. I somehow though had a feeling that he might not respond. Will that break my heart? I prayed to God with all fervor that he would at least be kind and polite to me.

The sunrise accelerated my heart beat, put an extra rush on my blood pressure and brought about a sunny flush to my whole being. Oh, why did life have to be so beautiful? As I awaited calmly, he jogged into the park, finished the dailies and took a seat. Yes, yes, yes !! This was the time I’d been waiting for. Pulses throbbing, my heart aching, I got up from my seat and walked boldly upto him. The moment had come.

It is at times like this, you have to keep a cool exterior even though you feel your blood boiling. I walked up with all the calm dignity I could muster and stood right in front of him. I think I think that was the first time he noticed me. I was besides myself when I gazed directly into his light gray eyes and he looked back fondly at me. There was something shining beautifully in his eyes. I didn’t get it at first at all. Was it love? Really, could it be? Oh, how I hoped so… and then there was that most handsome kind smile I’d ever seen in my life. I felt emboldened. I took the liberty to sit beside him, sharing his seat fro the first time. What else is bliss if its not this?

I shall never forget the moment when he flashed a smile at me. And his first words… "Do you come here every morning?" . Words did not come out of my mouth. I don’t know how long I sat there numb with joy. After that all I remember is him saying "it’s a beautiful day we met. I shall cherish your love forever. Won’t you be my friend now onwards?"

As if I wouldn’t. That was the moment in my whole life. A cool wind blew, birds along with my heart, sang. Flowers oozed out their fragrance and time stopped. My dreams came true. There was nothing in the world that could mar my happiness. I climbed on to his lap gracefully and coyly said "Meeeooow…" in the sweetest of voices I could. He laughed a sparkling laughter, lifted me from his lap and jogged back to his house all the while holding me close to him. And now I live happily in his home feeling loved and alive. What more can an ordinary cat like me want in life?